Being too Needy
I've had my fair share of being in a relationship and being the needy girlfriend. Don't you just hate it when he doesn't reply your text or when he doesn't tell you exactly where he is or what he's doing? To that person, what's the big deal? He/she was busy and didn't have time to reply your text, but for you, you're feeling so down and thinking are you not important enough for him/her to take a few seconds off to reply you? Or at least tell you that he/she's busy?
Sooner or later, fights occur and what do you know, he/she will tell you that they needed space or that he/she's not ready for a relationship.
You're world will then crumble down and it will shock you as you've given them so much of your love, only to be rejected.
Now, I've been through this before and it ain't good. I cried so hard that I became obsessed. Let me tell you, once you've heard your ex's friend say that you're crazy, then you know that it's time for a change.
From experiences from my friend and myself, I know that being needy is a turn off. And knowing all my bad habits and attitudes are the only things that are holding me back, I told myself that I must change, it is all for the better and the sake of my future. You gotta learn from your mistakes right?
A lot of people have the habit of saying "I've changed, I've learnt my lesson! Just give me a chance!" when they're trying to get their boyfriends/girlfriends back. But when you beg them to take you back by saying you've changed, it actually backfires on you because it only reflects on how needy you are of them to the point of pretending to change just to get them back. So of course they're not convinced!
Pretending to change and actually changing are both very different things! I had to learn that the hard way! You don't change overnight! No one changes overnight. The only reason why they
feel that you're so needy is because you care for that person too much than they think they deserve!
You're practically scaring them away! So how can you suddenly care for that person so much, and then just totally be ok with not caring the next day? You can't! It takes lots of lonely nights filled with tears and a few heartaches to finally not give a shit! To feel that you've had enough! And by the time that you find yourself finally changed, you'll find yourself better off without them! That you can actually focus on yourself rather than them!
It doesn't mean you've completely moved on from them, it just means that you will survive with or without them in your life! You don't have to get rid of them completely, you just need to have time to yourself without them. Even though it's not healthy to keep contact with them, as it'll only make the healing process slower, it doesn't mean that it's not possible.
Pretending to change and actually changing are both very different things! I had to learn that the hard way! You don't change overnight! No one changes overnight. The only reason why they
feel that you're so needy is because you care for that person too much than they think they deserve!
You're practically scaring them away! So how can you suddenly care for that person so much, and then just totally be ok with not caring the next day? You can't! It takes lots of lonely nights filled with tears and a few heartaches to finally not give a shit! To feel that you've had enough! And by the time that you find yourself finally changed, you'll find yourself better off without them! That you can actually focus on yourself rather than them!
It doesn't mean you've completely moved on from them, it just means that you will survive with or without them in your life! You don't have to get rid of them completely, you just need to have time to yourself without them. Even though it's not healthy to keep contact with them, as it'll only make the healing process slower, it doesn't mean that it's not possible.
After I started working and have lots of time to myself, I started to realize that there are so many things that I wanted to do and learn that I was too out of focus to realize in the past! Knowing that I have better things go do than to worry about why he/she did not reply my text and making myself go crazy. I'm not saying that I've completely changed, just that I've improved to be less needy than I was before. And let me tell you, the road was not easy AT ALL.
I'm not there yet, but I'm that much closer.
0 comments:
Post a Comment